It’s not even half of the year and I already have two of my grown-up life learnings to share. It is about the goals in my life. I thought it was to travel and cook great food. But whatever I do, there are two things I always want to achieve or hold on to –
Going to sleep without guilt, with peace, with answers to questions and knowing whatever you are doing is right.
Most of the times when we are thinking, we are not thinking of the right that we have done. We think of that tiny wrong thing that we did. Why? Because that will lead to the opposite of point 1. And that is what we want to avoid. Always ask yourself before doing anything – will I be able to sleep peacefully at night today by doing this? If yes, I don’t see why you shouldn’t do it even if the whole world is conspiring against you. If you feel something will bring peace to your mind and won’t question you later, as long as it is not harmful to anyone else, you should do it sans other people’s opinion. Your true-est people will always understand you and this is one way to know who they are!
I realised this through some bitter experiences but eventually, I came out strong because I discovered I was always right and underestimating myself. Today I will only do things I fancy and not because it is expected of me. I will only do things I believe in. Only then will I be doing the right thing. The right thing for me. I thought this was going to be really tough but in practice, it is not actually that big deal. Yes, you may not be please everyone but hey, you are pleased with yourself!
2. Ability to keep loving, forgiving and letting go.
This is not anything new but recently I watched an interview of an actor and this thought is stolen from there – “With all the bad that’s going on in the world, I only wish that my ability to love does not go away until I die.” It is hard. Because some cab driver misbehaved with us, we will not stop travelling by cabs, but we will see all of them through that lens and it is horrible because most of them are good human beings doubted for someone else’s mistake. But being a woman myself, I know we can’t help and today, we need to be aways aware of our surroundings. Such is the world.
But I want to bring this context of thought to people I know, I consider my friends, relatives and colleagues. Surely we can rise one level above and practice this. Surely we can give way to sympathy, empathy and affection in place of rudeness and bitter thoughts. I am trying hard to do this, practising it every single day. It is difficult to accept but the truth is that what’s going on in our minds is very different from what’s going on in others. It is easy to let go once we understand that we are all wired differently and even if someone intentionally hurts you, on your face, it is their failure, not yours. So don’t fret, rise a level above and pray for them before you tread ahead.